In the age of social media, we are bombarded with images and stories of people who live seemingly perfect lives. No-one posts about the miserable day they just had. It is all too easy to buy into this false narrative of perpetual success, the misguided belief that some people never lose, and as a result, to see our own life as a failure.
Every one of us has difficult problems to deal with, regrets to come to terms with, failures to live with, and personality traits that we dislike. This is what it means to be human. There is a reason why Persian rugs, Roman mosaics and Native American scarves all have intentional mistakes. Because every culture since antiquity has realised: only God is perfect. Whilst we should always strive for excellence, we must make peace with who we are, recognise our flaws and see the beauty in our imperfection. This is self-respect.
There will always be someone happy to knock you down, to criticise you for being who you are. You do not need to do the job yourself. It seems appealing to try to change your nature, to conform to other people’s expectations, but to have self-respect is to have confidence in your character and to have resilience in the face of criticism. This is not to say that we should be blind to our shortcomings, but rather to recognise them and take responsibility.
Whilst self-respect is vital to building confidence and maintaining physical and mental-health, it also underpins our interactions with others. We cannot respect and be honest towards others if we do not first respect ourselves. Fundamentally, self-respect is the basis of integrity and authenticity, without which, people will not respect you.
To me, the importance of self-respect is epitomised in the life of La’Ve Jackson. As a young man, he became addicted to alcohol which drove him into poverty and homelessness. On the streets he took drugs and fed himself by foraging for food in bins. After spending 17 years on the streets, where he thought he would die, he lost all self-respect. A stranger’s act of kindness in setting up a GoFundMe page motivated him to seek help for his alcoholism and drug addiction, and enabled him to buy a house. He now delivers talks on the importance of self-respect, whilst his life exemplifies the tragic, precipitous spiral of self-neglect.
Ultimately, what makes us distinct are the differences between us. To repress the characteristics that make us unique is to promote a world of dull uniformity. There’s something oddly beautiful about imperfection, and something just a little bit boring about being perfect.
George Christensen
Senior Prefect